Legolas and Aragorn's Adventure
by DragonsAreFriends
Summary: Legolas and Aragorn have adventures at the mall and many other exciting places. Very funny. No slash
1. A Day at the Mall

It was a very happy day till Legolas woke up then Leggy saw an ad in the newspaper for a new bow and arrow so he left for the mall. 20 minutes later Aragorn woke up and had to go to work at Rangers Rode Kill in the mall.  
  
In the mall there was a big line at Rangers Rode Kill including a dumb troll waiting for Aragorn. Then Aragorn arrived and the strangest thing he thought that could happen to him in all of his life happened today the troll was on a 500-calorie diet so he got a small birdie.  
  
Back in the weapons area Leggy saw that bow he wanted so he went to the casher with the bow and bought it. On the way back from the weapons area Leggy saw the candy shop. And saw Gimli taking the last slime-covered orc and had to fall to his knees and scream"NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why is this happing to my why!!!!!"  
  
Right next to the candy shop it was Rangers Rode Kill and he saw the troll walking out with one small birdie with wagon marks on it and walked closer to the restaurant till he was there. Then he ordered a large dragon and it was so big they had to deliver it to his house bye wagon leggy watched them leave to deliver it to his house.  
  
Then he went to the clothes shop for a new wardrobe and looked all around for pants and shirts and saw bellbottoms and a tie-dye shirt and bought them and wore it out. And then he went to the wigs shop and looked all around and found an afro so he bought it.  
  
Then he went back to Rangers Rode Kill to show Aragorn his new look. When Aragorn saw leggy with his new look he shouted "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He made Leggy very sad.  
  
When leggy got home his mom loved his clothes. His dad thought they were strange but he liked them. 


	2. A Day Downtown

The next day when Leggy woke up, he decided he wanted to go downtown. When the elf got changed he left. On the way there he saw Aragorn walking by.  
  
"What's up Homey?" Leggy shouted.  
  
"I got fired today", grumbled Aragorn miserably.  
  
"How sad. Do you want to come downtown with me?" Leggy asked.  
  
"Sure", Aragorn said, already brightening up.  
  
When they got downtown they got breakfast. They went to Gimli's Grill. Dun dun duuuuuuuun. They ordered a large steak and beer each. Amazingly they found that when they got their steak they got an action figure with it. Aragorn finished his steak first. With a mighty burp he walked outside and saw The Largest Candy Shop In Middle Earth. Aragorn's jaw dropped open and saliva filled his mouth. He ran into Gimli's Grill and got the elf. Leggy saw it and followed Aragorn into the shop. He smiled as he saw a slime covered orc.  
  
"I want it. I want it. I want it!!!" cried the elf.  
  
"Ooooooooh ChocoTroll my favorite!" Aragorn squealed.  
  
After Aragorn and Leggy filled two carts with candy, they left the candy shop.  
  
The next store they went to was Denethor's Place For Pyromaniacs. A half-burnt banner in the shop said 'Death to Smoky'. Legolas's eyes filled with terror as they saw Denethor himself running their way with his arms full of lit Gandalf's Fireworks. The two heroes ran for their lives. After running for an hour the two came across a Hobbit Waffle House. Aragorn's stomach gave a mighty moan.  
  
"I'm hungry!" he whined.  
  
Legolas sighed and they entered to see the strangest sight he had ever seen. 


	3. A Day at Leggy's

An orc trying to be a regular elf!!!!  
  
"Has the world gone mad?" Leggy said with a confused look on his face.  
  
The next day Leggy heard all the other elves were having other elves and humans over. So Leggy decided he wanted to invite people over so he invited Aragorn, Gimli, Gollum, Frodo, Sam, Faramir, Gandalf, Merry and Pippen.  
  
When everyone arrived it was twelve P.M. They decided they were going to play poker. Merry won twelve packs of Lembas bread. Gollum won five fishes. Frodo won seven packs of Old Toby the finest weed in the south farthing. Aragorn won a very small knife (half an inch of a knife). Leggy won a slime-covered orc.  
  
After they finished playing poker they decided to play Elves and orcs. Gollum Merry and Pippen were elves. The rest were orcs. The orcs won.  
  
"Sad but true," said Merry to Pippen.  
  
Everyone decided that they needed to play elfopoly. Leggy was a tree. Aragorn was a bow. Gollum was the arrow. Gandalf was a spotted lizard. Faramir was a shriveled leaf. Sam was a purple Pony with red polka dots. I landed on the free pony space, so I won a free pony.  
  
The next thing they did was a scavenger hunt. The things on the list were: a golden leaf, a yellow tree or plant, a lime green wagon and the One gold Ring. The teams were Aragorn, Legoals, Gimli, Gollum and Frodo were the evil monkeys and said they would take over the jungle gyms of middle earth. The rest were the good Piggies and said they would conquer and enslave the Evil monkeys, though many people said they couldn't do it.  
  
Through many battles the piggies and monkeys fought but one did not gain any victories over one another. So they decided after many councils to compromise. The Monkeys brought machine guns to the council and blew the piggies away so the monkeys won.  
  
The piggies came back to life by the power of the king piggy of all Piggie's, and for revenge played spank the monkey on the computer!!! The evil monkeys heard that the good piggy where playing spank the monkey on there computer. So the evil monkeys wanted revenge on them.  
  
The evil monkeys found the good Peggy's so they put dynamite down their filthy little throats!!!  
  
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" shouted Aragorn with an demon look on his face! The good Peggy's were not killed but all there bones are cracked. The evil monkeys hated to wait for them to get out of the hospital. So why the good Peggy's were in the hospital they planed to destroy the evil monkeys.  
  
Before the good Peggy's sinned the piece contracted there was an epic war. After both teams got ready at the battle filed and were ready to charge into the each other's teams  
  
"There may come a day when the world of the monkey's come crashing down but its not these day these day we fight" Said Aragorn with a warriors face.  
  
"You shale fall you filthy little monkeys!" shouted Gandalf while charging at the monkeys.  
  
"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!" shouted Aragorn  
  
"HAY THAT'S MY LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Squid Gandalf.  
  
"Not any more" said Aragorn.  
  
Gandalf got really made.  
  
"Beets them to the ground" said Gollum  
  
"What is the point of these war what do we have agenst each other" Said Leggy  
  
Everyone stopped and sheathed their swords. And went Back to Leggys house and the next game they decided to play was how many glasses of grape juice they can drink in 30 minuets. leggy got 12 glasses. Aragorn got 11 glasses. I got 14 glasses. The rest got 8 glasses. By the time they finished doing that it was time for everyone to go home.  
  
For diner after everyone left Leggy hade the dragon he ordered yesterday. 


	4. A Day Trying to Find a Job

The next day when Legolas woke up he turned on the TV and there was an ad for a job at the candy shop for two, either elves, men, orcs, wizards or Dwarfs. Legolas called Aragorn and tolled Aragorn about it. When Aragorn and Legolas got there the manager saw them and ran screaming. Then Legolas remembered what happened when he was 500 years old. He and his mother went to the candy shop the first day it opened and when they entered in Legolas ran and destroyed the place and almost killed the manager of the shop, which had a hard time trying to hire another manager afterwards.  
  
Aragorn found the manager hiding under the checkout counter.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Screamed the manager  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Screamed Aragorn  
  
The manager stood up.  
  
"BACK FOWL THING" Shouted the manager  
  
When that happened a huge wave of wind blue Aragorn back! Aragorn and legolas ran for their lives. Legolas looked back and saw the manager running after him with a sword on a horse. When the manager caught up with them he spoke to Legolas.  
  
"I am your father!"  
  
"NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" said Leggy  
  
"Join me and I'll give you a chocolate bar," Said the manager  
  
"A slime covered orc and I'll think about it," Said Leggy  
  
'Ok if you will use your destructive powers of DOOM on Middle Earth so I can take it over!!" said the manager  
  
"NEVER!" Said Leggy  
  
Legolas kicked him off the horse.  
  
"NNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" said the manager  
  
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!! You fell off HAHAHA!" said Leggy.  
  
When Aragorn and Legolas got away from the candy shop they saw the all of the good piggy's and they where surrounding them, and all of them had swords.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Legolas and Aragorn  
  
Legolas took out his handy cell phone and called the evil monkeys  
  
"COME QUICK! THE GOOD PIGGYS ARE ABOUT TO KILL US!!!!!!"  
  
**5 seconds later**  
  
"We're gonna blade you all like stuffed pigs mwuhahahaha!" Said the evil monkeys  
  
"Then why are you all carrying machine guns?" said the good piggys.  
  
"Since it's getting dark, we'll meet you here tomorrow, ok?" Said the evil monkeys. 


	5. A Day to Stop a War

When Legolas woke up he got on his computer and Aragorn was on and so were all of the good piggies. Aragorn said to the good piggys "We need to have another meeting at the council of Elrond". The evil monkeys knew what that meant more MACHINE GUNS!!!!  
  
When they got there the evil monkeys surrounded them.  
  
"Give up or were gonna kill you all MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAA!" said Leggy  
  
"WE GIVES UP!" said Gollum.  
  
Legolas and Aragorn left and went to Denethor's Place For Pyromaniacs. Legolas bought a banner for his room and 904,963,465,842,746,634,634,685 packages of fireworks. And Aragorn bought 953,634,365,258,575,465,764,169,357 packages of fireworks.  
  
Then they found the good piggies and they shoved all of the packages down their throats and lit Legolas's arrows on fire and Leggy shot them.  
  
CAAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
2 hours later  
  
The good piggies came back with machine guns and killed balloons with Legolas and Aragorn's faces on them. After the war was over Legolas wanted to go on a vacation. He and Aragorn left for Hobbiton on the way there Legolas saw a mall he have never seen before.  
  
He parked his wagon and ran toward it.  
  
"Why do you want to go in so bad?" said Aragorn  
  
"I need a makeover." answered leggy  
  
When they got to the door  
  
"NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" shouted Leggy 


End file.
